Heaven
by CaptainRogersGirl0829
Summary: Inspired by "911 remix Heaven" and the 911 incident. Margaret- Peggy- Rogers has to go through life without a father when Steve dies in one of the towers. She returns to his grave multiple times to update him on her life, not wanting him to feel like he missed out on a single thing. Family fluff! Tragedy! Sadness! Natasha/ Steve; Steve/ Peggy daughter-father bond.
1. Days Prior to Sep 11th

**_DISCLAIMER!: Unfortunately I do not own the Avengers, but fortunately I do own Peggy Rogers. (: Marvels owns the Avengers._**

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><p><em>September 4th, 2001... <em>

_Margaret ran up to her father smiling proudly. "Daddy, daddy, daddy, daddy! Guess what I can do!?" She launched herself into Steve's arms and he happily picked his daughter up into his arms. _

_He smiles at her, "What did you do Peggy?" In answer she stuck out her foot for him to see. Steve stared puzzled at the sight of his daughter's foot. "You put on your shoe?" He asks. Margaret bursts into laughter and shook her head. _

_"No daddy! Your silly. I tied my shoe laces all by myself!" She says excitedly throwing her arms around her father's neck. "And mommy didn't help me at all!"_

_Steve's smile grew bigger when he focused on the tied laces staring at him. "You did? That's great news Peggy!" Steve threw Margaret- Peggy-up in the air and catches her on her fall back down. Peggy begins to laugh uncontrollably. "I'm so proud of you! Did you show mommy?" _

_"I was there when she did it." Steve looked up at the sound of Natasha's voice and smiled. She stood in the entrance of the hallway with a proud/amused smile on her face. "She's growing up fast." Natasha comments making Steve frown. _

_Steve's arms tighten around Peggy and he shakes his head. "Don't say such horrible words, she's my baby. She's not growing up and she will stay little and cute forever. Right Peg?" _

_Peggy smiles at her father, "Whatever you say daddy." Steve nodded contently, _

_"That's what I like to hear." He places Peggy on the ground after giving her a sweet kiss on her forehead. _

_Natasha walks up to them, "Sweetie why don't you go get the others? Daddy's leaving soon and he wants to say goodbye to everyone." _

_Almost instantly Peggy's happy smile vanishes and she looks up at Steve sadly. "Do you have to go daddy?" _

_"Yes baby," Steve sighs sadly. "We talked about this." _

_"But New York is far away!" Peggy winces wrapping her arms around Steve's torso. "And I'll miss you too much." _

_"I'll miss you two Peggy. How could I not miss my two favorite girls?" Steve's hand reaches down to cup the back of her head as he pulls Natasha to his side. "But it's only going to be for a week. Daddy will be back on the 11th, I promise." _

_Peggy pouts, "That's a long time." She mumbles into Steve's pant leg. Steve chuckles and bends down to be at height level with his daughter. Her eyes are watery and Steve knows she's close to crying soon, so to prevent that he brings up a topic that always makes her smile. "Would you let me go if I promise to bring you back presents?" _

_It's almost funny how quick Peggy's eyes clear and a smile spreads across her face. "Presents!?" She asks excitedly bouncing. _

_Natasha and Steve laugh. "Yes, if your a good girl for mommy and are strong while I'm away, I'll bring you back a lot of presents." Steve bribes which earns a disapproving look from Natasha. Peggy already had a lot of things, courtesy of her uncle Tony. She did not need more stuff. Steve shrugged in reply and turned his attention back to his bouncing, excited child. "You hear me Peggy? If you're good, daddy will bring to back A LOT of presents. Okay?" _

_"Okay daddy!" _

_"Now come here, give me a BIG hug! I want the biggest hug you've ever given me so I can last through the week." Peggy's smile grew and she reached up to wrap her arms around Steve's neck. In return Steve wraps his around her torso and pulled them closer together. He buried his face in his daughter's shoulder as Peggy laid hers on his chest. _

_"I'll miss you daddy." _

_"I'll miss you too sweetie. I love you." _

_"I love you more." Peggy says looking away smiling. _

_Steve shakes his head, "Impossible. Give daddy a kiss." Peggy leans in and presses her lips softly onto Steve's cheek. "Okay, I love you." He kisses Peggy's cheek, before standing and looking at Natasha. "And I love you." Instead of a cheek kiss, Natasha gets a long passionate kiss that emits an 'Ewwww!' from Peggy. Her parents break apart laughing. "Okay girls, I'll be back later."_

_"What about the others?" Natasha asks. _

_Steve shrugs, "I'll see them on my way down." Steve goes to grab his duffle bag. _

_"Make sure to take plenty of pictures because I want to see what it looks like on the inside. I've only seen the outside of it." Natasha says as she walks Steve over to the door._

_"What, what looks like inside mommy?" _

_Natasha turned to her daughter and smiles, "Daddy's going to be staying in one of the twin towers in New York." _

_Peggy's eyes nearly pop out of her head, "You are!? Daddy those are the biggest things I've ever seen. They're taller than uncle Tony's tower!" Steve laughed, _

_"Yeah they are." _

_"Then you gots to take pictures so mommy and I can see." Peggy commanded. _

_"I will Peg, don't worry. Now I've got to go before I miss my plane." _

_Natasha catches Steve on his way to the door. She grabs the collar of his shirt and stares into his eyes. "Be safe." She whispers to him. Steve covers Natasha's hand with his own. "I will. I'll come home in a week, I promise. I love you." _

_Natasha smiles, "I love you too." _

_They share one more kiss before Steve exits out the door, duffle bag in hand. _

_The minute the door closes, Peggy's shoulders deflate and she frowns. "I miss daddy already." _

_"Me too baby, but you know what? Tonight, after dinner we'll give him a call. Okay? That way you can say goodnight to him before bed." _

_"Okay mommy." _

_Natasha smiles before reaching a hand out to Peggy. "Now come on love, let's go see uncle Clint and aunt Bobbi." Peggy gives her a weak smile before grabbing her mother's hand and following her out the door._

_._

_._

_September 7th, 2014…_

_Peggy runs as fast as she can, her destination set in mind. She follows the sound of her mother's voice as it comes from her parents' bedroom. When she reaches the door, she waste no time in yanking it open. And there he is... her father. _

_Well, technically. He wasn't there in person, but on Natasha's laptop screen. Still he was there, she could see him and her him so he was there. _

_When the door slammed against the wall, it startled her parents who both jumped, especially Natasha. She whirled around, a curse at the tip of her tongue, but she stopped short at seeing her child's beaming face. Natasha relaxed and smiled at Peggy. Peggy looked at Natasha with hopeful eyes and with a quick nod, Peggy was over by the bed clambering on to talk to Steve. "Hi daddy!" She shouts once she's climbs into Natasha's lap. _

_Steve smiles, "Hi my love. How are you?" _

_"I'm good. What about you?" She asks in her high pitched voice. Peggy was smiling like crazy and couldn't find a will to stop. _

_Steve shrugged, "Okay, but I miss you." _

_"I miss you too. When are you going to come home?" Peggy asks looking very anxious. _

_"Soon." Steve replies._

_Peggy raises an eyebrow, something she had inherited from her mother, and crossed her arms. "How long is soon?" _

_"4 days and I'll be on the plane back by morning." _

_"Good because I need you to come home and read to me. Uncle Tony, Clint, Brucie and Thor are doing a terrible job. I only like the way you and mommy tell stories." _

_Steve let out a sharp laugh at his daughter's blunt statement. "Yes Peggy, I'm come home to read to you as soon as I can." Steve replies sarcastically. "It's not like I'm used for anything else, except reading to you." _

_Natasha laughed resting her chin on Peggy's shoulder. "You've been apart of this family for… what? 4 years and now you're barely starting to get it through you're thick skull." She joked laughing. _

_Steve frowned and pretended to be stern, a smile slowly starting to replace his frown. "Your going to be sorry when I come back home. Both of you." Natasha and Peggy share a laugh as Steve shakes his head at the both of them. "Okay guys, I have to go, but I will talk to you soon. Alright? I love you." _

_"We love you too." The girls reply on unison. _

_"Talk to you soon Steve." Natasha says before Steve gives them a nod and the screen turns black. _

_Peggy huffed a sigh and curled into Natasha's body. "I miss him... so much." _

_"I know love, I miss him too. Hey you want to have daddy's favorite dinner tonight?" _

_Peggy made a face, "But I don't like carrots." She winced._

_Natasha laughed, "Then you don't have to eat them. You can have the steak." _

_"Okay mommy." Peggy beams. Natasha turns to get off the bed to make dinner, but Peggy stops her. "Mommy?" _

_"Yes sweetie?" _

_"Can I sleep with you tonight? In one of daddy's shirts?" Peggy asks hopefully._

_Natasha smiles down at her and cups her chin, "Of course you can. Now come on, you wanna help mommy make dinner?" _

_"Yeah!" _

_"Then let's go." Peggy jumps of the bed, grabs a hold of Natasha's hand and pulls her towards the bedroom door. _

_"Come on mommy, come on!" _

_Natasha laughs, "I'm coming. I'm coming." _

_._

_._

_September 10, 2001…_

_Through the next three days, Peggy made a habit of talking to Steve constantly. Whether it would be on the phone, or face time or texting messaging. Either way, she found a way to contact him. They were always talking. The only time they didn't was when Steve had to go to work or meetings, but immediately after he'd call Peggy or Peggy would call him. Of course Natasha would join in their conversations, but most of it was between Steve and Peggy. Peggy couldn't get enough of her father. And when she woke up the morning of September 10__th__, she was practically bouncing with excitement._

_She literally jumped out of bed and ran to the other side of the bed. She clambered quickly and without a second thought, Peggy flung herself onto where Natasha was. "Mommy, mommy, mommy!" Natasha groaned in response, as her hands clutched her sheets. Peggy giggled when her mother shook her head no like a small child. "Mommy wake up!"_

"_No. I'm sleeping." Natasha replies with her eyes closed._

"_No you're not." Peggy laughs. When she doesn't get a reply, Peggy lays down beside her mother facing her and stares at her face._

_Without opening her eyes, Natasha reaches out and snakes an arm around Peggy's torso pulling her closer. Peggy smiles. "Sleep with mommy." Natasha says. "Let's not get up."_

_Peggy huffs, "But we got to get things ready for daddy's welcome home party! It needs to be perfect, like auntie Pepper said!"_

_Natasha in mid- moan stopped and with a sigh opens her eyes. "Alright, I'm up. I'm up." With one big push, Natasha hoists herself up to a sitting position and looks down at her daughter who stays laying down. Natasha frowns at her, "You're lucky I love you and you're dad. If your uncle Clint came and woke me up I'd skin him alive."_

_Peggy smiles, "I know mommy. Now come on. Auntie Pepper, Janie, Darcy, Betty and Bobbi are taking us to the mall to buy things for daddy's party." _

_Natasha smiles, "Okay, go get ready and I'll meet you in the living room."_

"_You got it mommy." Peggy says before shooting upright and jumping off the bed. She runs out of the room without another word._

_Natasha begins to get out of bed, but as she stood there's a sudden foreign feeling in the pit of her stomach. It was strong enough to force her to sit back down. It was a feeling that she's felt before, it wasn't totally alienated. But she couldn't quite put a name to it. It made her feel nervous and scared. This feeling always accompanied a dangerous mission that she knew was going to go wrong. And she was right every time which was what made her even more scared. Because there was only one Avenger on a mission that day. Everyone else was still at the tower._

_Without wasting another second, Natasha throws herself over the bed and reaches to the other beside table where her phone rests. She quickly dials Steve's number in and puts the phone to her ear as she throws her hair out of her face. After the fifth ring, Natasha became even more anxious. "Come on, pick up." She whispers. And he does._

"_Hello?"_

_Natasha sighs in relief, "Steve it's Natasha."_

"_Hey Nat!" Steve's enthusiastic voice shouts excitedly through the phone. It made Natasha smile. "What's up?"_

_She felt extremely better instantly, now that she heard Steve's voice. "Um.. n-nothing. I was just calling to make sure you're okay."_

_She could practically see Steve grinning from the other side of the world, "I'm fine. More then fine. I cant wait till tomorrow so I can come home."_

"_Neither can we. Especially Peggy. We have a surprise for you when you come home." She informs with a smile._

"_A surprise?" Steve questions. "That sounds interesting. Do tell?"_

"_I cant, it's a surprise!" Natasha says laughing. "You will see it when you come home."_

"_You're such a tease." Steve says laughing. His laugh sounded like music to her ears._

_Natasha sighs in relief, "Alright I just wanted to call and see how you're doing. I miss you."_

"_You have no idea how much I miss you Nat. It feels weird going to bed and not having you by my side."_

_Natasha nods, "Tell me about it. Well I at least I had Peggy as substitute for you being missing, but it wasn't the same. She slept in you're shirts for the past couple of days, hope you don't mind."_

"_Of course not. I cant wait to come home and I sent the presents I bought for Peggy to you guys." Steve says._

_Natasha quirks an eyebrow, "Why didn't you just bring them with you on the plane?"_

"_I couldn't fit them into my suitcase and I'm pretty sure I couldn't take them all on the plane with me so I just sent them."_

_Natasha rolls her eyes and shakes her head in disapproval. "How much stuff did you get her?"_

_Steve laughs, "You'll see when it gets there."_

_Natasha pouts, "Fine, leave me in suspense." Steve laughs again making Natasha smile. "I'll let you go, I'm sure you have some important business to take care of."_

"_Unfortunately, you're right." Steve replies and Natasha could just imagine his lips creating a small pout._

"_Okay, bye. I love you Steve."_

"_I love you too. Bye."_

_And the call ends, but the feeling in Natasha's stomach only continues to grow stronger._

…

_Later that night, after dinner, Natasha couldn't ignore the feeling any longer. It was like it wanted to be known and wouldn't go away. It was constant and throughout the mall trip, it was hard to focus on anything except the feeling. She hated it. She made sure to text Steve every hour and would relax when he'd reply, but still the feeling never went away._

_As she was getting Peggy ready for bed, it was then that she realized her daughter was having the exact same feeling as her. Because she voiced it out loud and it made Natasha worry even more. "Mommy?" Peggy whispers softly as Natasha began to dress her daughter after she had taken her shower._

"_What baby?"_

"… _I-Is daddy… okay?"_

_The question made Natasha halt in her action and she stared down at her daughter confused. Her stomach knotted tightly and she took a deep breath before answering. "Of course he is," She replies, her voice a little shaky. She curses herself mentally and clears her throat before continuing, "Why do you ask?" Peggy looked down at her parent's bedspread and began to trace the designs, opting to stay silent. Becoming concern, Natasha slips Peggy's shirt over her head before sitting on the bed and bringing her daughter into her lap. Resting her chin on Peggy's shoulder, Natasha rocks her back and forth softly. The touch of her mother calms her immensely and Peggy presses her face into Natasha's chest. "Why baby? What's wrong?"_

"… _I… I just have this um… feeling like something… bad is going to happen." Peggy finally admits after several long minutes of silence. _

"_To daddy?" Natasha asks to clarify. Peggy nods sheepishly. Natasha pulls away from her daughter to look into her eyes. Placing a finger underneath her chin, she forces her head up. "Where did this come from?"_

"_I had a dream." Peggy admits getting teary eyed. "About daddy dying. It was awful mommy."_

"_Why didn't you tell me earlier? Why didn't you wake me up?"_

_Peggy begin to sob, "Because I didn't want it to be real. If I tolded you, it might've come true."_

_Natasha turned her daughter around to cradle her to her chest, Peggy pressing her face into Natasha's chest as she cried. "Peggy, daddy is not going to die. He's coming home tomorrow and is going to be with us. Are you listening to me?" Natasha asked looking down and removing the hair concealing Peggy's face from her. Peggy nodded slightly, "It was just a bad dream, and everything is going to be okay."_

"_But-"_

"_No buts." Natasha interrupts. She sighs and presses a kiss before laying Peggy down. "Peggy, daddy's coming home tomorrow and we're having a party for him and we're all going to have a great time tomorrow. Alright?" Peggy nods slightly after a long pause. "Alright." Natasha leans down and kisses Peggy's forehead. "Goodnight baby."_

_Before Natasha could stand up and walk away, Peggy reached up and quickly grabbed onto Natasha's wrist. "Momma… don't leave. Stay."_

"_Mommy's just going to take a shower sweetie."_

_Peggy begins to cry, "Please… stay."_

_Natasha frowns sadly and nods, "Okay. Scoot over so mommy can lie down." Peggy smiles before tugging on Natasha's wrist and moving over. When Natasha lies beside her daughter, her arms encircle her immediately and she breathes in the scent from her daughter's shampoo. The smell makes her relax, but only slightly. She was still worried, because of the feeling she had been feeling all day and her daughter's confession. She debated on calling Steve to assure not only herself, but her daughter that he was alright, but one look at the clock said it was late at night. Natasha really needed to get her daughter on a schedule. It was 11 p.m. Steve would be going to be right now so she wouldn't bother him. But she will wake up extremely earlier tomorrow and call him. He's a soldier so she knows that he goes to bed strictly at 11 p.m. and wakes up bright and early at 5 a.m._

_She'll be awake before that. Kissing her daughter's forehead, Natasha forgets her shower and getting into her PJs. She was so damn tired from the day's festivities that she could barely keep her eyes open. Besides why would she? She was full from dinner, everything for the party was set and ready to go, and she had her daughter in her arms. There couldn't be a better time to fall asleep. And so she did._

_She cuddled closer to her daughter and closed her eyes. Natasha and Peggy fell into a deep sleep with smiles on their faces. Unbeknownst to them of how tomorrow's events will change their lives forever._


	2. 5 Years Old

**_-"Death leaves a heartache no one can heal; love leaves a memory no one can steal._****_"- (Richard Puz)_**

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><p>"It's been a year daddy..." 5 year old Margaret Rogers kneels beside her father's grave, flowers clutched tightly in her hands. Tears swim in her eyes, but she holds them back and she stares longingly at the large tombstone. She may not know the real meaning of death, but she understands that her father will never come back. "I really really miss you." Margaret places her precious dandelions on the moist ground below her. She looks up at the tombstone and a tear escapes cascading down her cheek. She quickly wipes it away. "Mommy says your safe now... in a beautiful place called heaven."<p>

**"****Oh I'm thinking about our younger years.**

Peggy gave a weak smile as she tightened her grip on the flowers, "We had your favorite dinner tonight."

**There was only you and me. **

Her voice became brighter as she proudly announced, "I ate it all up!"

**We were young and wild and free. **

But after a pause, she admitted quietly, "Even though I don't like carrots."

**Now nothing can take you away from me.**

"I learned how to swim this summer." Peggy giggled softly, using her jacket sleeve to wipe her nose.

**We've been down that road before,**

"I can even open my eyes,"

**But that's over now.**

"when I'm underwater."

**You keep me coming back for more.**

"Cant you see me?"

**Baby you're all that I want when you're lying here in my arms. I'm finding it hard to believe, we're in heaven."**

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><p><em>"<em>_Baby could you come in here for a second? Mommy, uncles and aunties need to speak with you?" Natasha's voice flittered through the halls catching Peggy's attention as she continued to align her dolls perfectly straight on her bed. The way she knows her father likes._

_Peggy smiles at the thought of her father coming home any minute and she answered in a daze, "Yes mommy." After placing a kiss on one of her doll's forehead, she bounced out of her room and down the hallway. She was expecting everyone to have things ready. For the balloons to be floating in the air, the food spread along the table and the banner that read 'Welcome Home Steve/ Daddy' up in the air. But when she walked in, there was nothing. Except everyone sitting around Natasha as she cried heavily. Everyone else was crying too, but not as much as Natasha._

_Peggy stared confused at the sight in front of her. She stopped in the entrance of the doorway and cocked her head to the side. The sight of her family put her slightly on edge and all the happy feelings disappeared as soon as she entered the room. The adults hadn't noticed Peggy yet; they were too busy trying to console Natasha and themselves and also trying to put themselves together before Peggy came. But they were too slow to compose themselves. It was Darcy who noticed Peggy standing in the doorway. She quietly informed everyone and that's when all eyes went to Peggy._

_Natasha looked up and her bottom lip began to quiver at the sight of her daughter clad in the outfit her father had gotten her for her fourth birthday. Steve had picked it out himself and Peggy had fallen in love with it. She wore it every chance she got and today was a special occasion so she threw it on excitedly. But the outfit only made Natasha even more hysterical. She fell off the couch and onto her knees, her body curling in on herself. _

_Clint leaned over her, wrapping his arms around her body comfortingly as his own tears cascaded like an endless river down her face. "It's okay. It's okay." He whispers softly. Natasha just shook her head as she rocked back and forth, Clint following after her, whimpering 'no' over and over again._

_Peggy took a tentative step into the room, her eyes beginning to water as she watched her mother continue to sob. Natasha never cries. It's rare that Peggy ever saw her mother cry and when she did, it was always bad news. But this is different. This isn't just crying… it was hysteria. And hysteria is only associated with terrible, awful news. Without even knowing what was happening, Peggy began to cry. "M-Mommy?"_

_"__Mommy's okay Peggy." Pepper reassured, standing on shaky legs and coming to grab Peggy's hand. But she moves away before she can touch her. "It's okay."_

_Peggy just continues to cry, "Mommy?" She repeated. She didn't want comfort from anyone else, she wanted her mother._

_Natasha looked up at her daughter and with a slight nudge from Bruce, she took a deep breath and wiped her tears. With help from both Bruce and Clint, Natasha stands on her weak and numb legs. "C-Come here sw-sweet-tie?" Natasha hiccupped, reaching her arms out._

_Peggy looks nervously at Pepper unsure of whether to run into Natasha's arm or not. She was scared. They were going to tell her something. Something bad. And she didn't want that. Pepper gave her a sad nod before pushing her slightly towards Natasha. With the slight push, Peggy began to move quietly and slowly towards her mother. When she came in reach of Tony, the person farthest from her mother, he grabbed onto her hand and escorted her into her mother's arms. Natasha gratefully wrapped her arms around Peggy and buried her head deep into Peggy's neck and shoulder. Now concealed from her daughter's view, Natasha then took those few moments to compose herself and gain confidence. Because what she was about to tell Peggy was probably the hardest thing she'd ever have to do. _

_It was the hardest thing she had to do. But it had to be done._

_After another five minutes buried deep in Peggy's shoulder, Natasha forced herself to pull away and look into her daughter's red, swollen eyes. She was crying already because she knew something was wrong. Peggy was like her father, institutive. But she got easily reading people's emotions and thoughts from her mother. And right now, it wasn't helping Natasha's case at all. "Momma?"_

_"__Sweetie come sit down. Next to mommy. We have something to tell you. Something important."_

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><p>"I started kindergarten this year." Peggy said as she reached inside her jacket pocket to get something out.<p>

**"****Love is all that I need and I found it there in your heart. It isn't too hard to see, we're in heaven.**

"I carry a picture of us in my Blue's Clues lunchbox." With shaky fingers, she unfolded the folded paper she retrieved from her jacket pocket to reveal a photo of her, Natasha and Steve when she was an infant. It was of the day she was born. Natasha was lying on the hospital bed, with Steve sitting beside her on the bed with Margaret in his arms. They were both smiling down at her as if she were the only thing that grounded them to Earth. Their smiles said everything and they're eyes were filled with so much love that it made Peggy smile and cry every time she opened her lunch box and saw it.

**Oh once in your life you find someone.**

Peggy places the picture down in front of Steve's tombstone. "You are the greatest daddy." She whispers so lovingly and adoringly with a large smile spreading across her face.

**Who will turn you're world around. Pick you up when you're feeling down. Now nothing can change what you mean to me.**

The smile on her face only grows bigger as she lets out a happy gasp. "I can swing on the swing by myself!" She blurts out excitedly.

**There's a lot that I could say. But just hold me now.**

But the excitement died down immediately. She gazed longingly at the picture in front of her before moving her gaze to her lap. Her shoulders deflate sadly, "Even though I miss you pushing me."

**Cause our love will light the way.**

"Can't you see me?" Peggy asked, her voice cracking slightly.

**Baby you're all that I want, when you're lying here in my arms. I'm finding it hard to believe, we're in heaven."**

* * *

><p><em>Once the four year old was seated, she immediately curled into Bruce's side and stared up at her mother fearfully. Natasha hates the way her daughter is staring at her right now, but there's nothing she can say that will reassure her. She cant say 'everything will be alright' to her because she wouldn't listen. Especially once Natasha told her. It was hard though. Really hard.<em>

_"__Sweetie, I… we-… um…" Natasha was really lost for words. She looked around the circle at all of her friends for help, but no one knew what to say._

_Peggy sniffles, grabbing onto Natasha's hand and giving it a hard squeeze. "M-Momma… tell me. What's wrong?"_

_As Natasha gazed down at her daughter, her beautiful four year old baby girl, it finally struck her how hard this news will hit her. She loved him. She loved him more than she ever loved anyone, besides her mother. She was a total daddy's girl and this will wreck her. She was only four years old. She was still a baby. Her baby._

_Natasha leaned over and grabbed Peggy from Bruce to cuddle her into her side. She needed all the support she was going to get. Having her family nearby and her daughter at her side, it made Natasha feel so much better._

* * *

><p>A sudden thought struck her and made her giggle happily, the flowers in her hands shaking as her whole body shook with giggles. "I miss how you use to tickle me."<p>

**"****And love is all that I need**

"Tickle my belly." Her arms wrapped around her belly as the distant memory of her belly tickling rises to surface and she can faintly feel it within her stomach.

**And I found it there in your heart.**

"My belly hurts." She admits when the tickling sensation becomes too much and that's when it disappears. Along with the slight happiness it brought it because it made her feel like her father was actually kneeling beside her tickling her stomach. It made her happy and now that it's gone… so is he.

**It isn't too hard to see, we're in heaven.**

The disappearance of the security she felt when she was being 'tickled' made her feel even more small and deepened her sadness. She began to tear up, "I try not to cry." She admits, her voice tightening.

**I've been waiting for so long.**

"Mommy says it's okay." The tears come back full force and it takes everything within her to not burst into tears. She manages to keep most of the tears in, except two that fall down her cheekbone.

**For something to arrive, for love to come along.**

The two lone tears fall off her cheek and into the roses that she now clutches to her chest for support. The tears stain the red roses as more follow after the two. "I know you don't like it when I cry." Peggy whimpers, a hand coming to wipe the falling tears even though it doesn't matter when more fall down.

**Now our dreams are coming true, through the good times and the bad.**

"You never wanted me to be sad." Peggy replied glancing down at the picture. Memories of her father always trying to cheer her up when she's upset and of them laughing flood through her mind. She begins to cry softly.

**I'll be standing there by you.**

"I try daddy, but it hurts." Peggy cries, leaning forward, crushing the roses beneath her. She doesn't try to stop the tears as they flow easily out of her eyes. What was the point in trying not to cry? Peggy distinctly recalls Bruce once telling her to never hold in emotions. It will only make it hurt worse. So she didn't.

**Baby you're all that I want**

A hand comes to cover her mouth, like she saw her mother do the day she was told what happened. The day she found out. "Is it true you're not coming home?"

**When you're lying here in my arms**

"Maybe someday," Peggy speaks looking away, unable to look at the grave anymore.

**I'm finding it hard to believe, we're in heaven**

"I can visit you in heaven, okay?" she spoke, her voice turning from sad to hopefully.

**And love is all that I need and I've found it there in your heard. It isn't too hard to see, we're in heaven.**

Peggy looked behind her where she located her mother standing a few feet away from her under an umbrella to protect her from the pouring rain. During Peggy's visit, it started to rain, but the little girl didn't care. She continued to stay planted in her spot by her father, letting the water hit her and soak through her clothes. She wanted to be with her father and she wouldn't let a little thing such as rain keep her from being with him. But she was starting to get cold, really cold. Natasha gave her a daughter a small smile and raised an eyebrow. Peggy nodded before turning back to her father. "It's time for me to go now." She whispers standing from her spot. Placing the roses down on his grave, she admits, "I sleep with my light on… just in case you come home and kiss me goodnight." As she places the roses down, she retrieves her picture again and holds it to her chest.

* * *

><p><em>"<em>_Baby… there was an accident."_

_"__What kind of accident?" Peggy asks immediately, looking up at Natasha._

_"__A big one and… because of it daddy wont be coming home."_

_"__Not today?" Peggy asks, not really comprehending what she's being told. "He's coming tomorrow?" Her statement caused everyone around her to burst into tears causing her to panic._

_Natasha shakes her head, "No sweetie… never. Daddy's not coming home."_

_Peggy's heart stops and drops into her stomach. "W-What?" she whispers shocked._

_"__Peggy, daddy's dead. He died this morning when the twin towers collapsed."_

* * *

><p>"I love you so much… I miss you daddy."<p>

* * *

><p>- "<strong>Closed eyes, heart not beating, but a living love." - (Avis Corea)<strong>


	3. 10 Years Old

"**When someone you love becomes a memory, the memory becomes a treasure." –**_**Unknown**_

* * *

><p>The rocks crush underneath her feet as she trudges along, slightly scared of the many different tombstone she passes. It's not that she was afraid of the tombstones themselves, it was thought of her stepping on dead bodies and the looming sense of loss and depression that surrounds the place. Well it was no surprise because it <em>was<em> a graveyard. But still, it didn't make her feel any better.

She continued her slow, steady walk towards her destination. She can vaguely feel her mother walk behind her, but she didn't pay much mind to her. After another minute of walking, she turns a corner and comes face to face with it.

With her father's tombstone.

Just the sight makes her upset and she clutches the roses in her hands tighter to her chest. Every time she visits him every year, she had different colored roses. But always roses. Each color signifies some special meaning. The very first time she visited her father when she was five, the color was black which meant _death or farewell. _ Now her roses were dark pink which means _appreciation, gratitude,and "Thank You". _

She glanced back at her mother slowly, and with an encouraging nod from her, she steps forward. Peggy Rogers walks straight up to her father's tombstone with the confidence of a 10 year old. She looks back and finds Natasha rooted her spot as she stares on. Peggy gives her a weak smile and Natasha smiles back as a tear slips down her cheek.

Dropping to her knees, Peggy takes a deep breath and glances up at Steve's tombstone sadly. With a sigh, she takes a shaky breath and begins to speak,

"It's been five years daddy."

**"Oh- once in your life you find someone**

"I'm in fifth grade now." She replies running her hands through the long wet grass that must've just been watered as she feels her hand get wet.

**Who will turn your world around**

"I really like computers!"**  
><strong>

**Bring you up when you're feeling down**

"But math is hard…" Peggy admits, her shoulders deflating as she thinks about the hard math questions that she hasn't done on her homework. Steve use to be good at math, or at least that's what Natasha had told her. Steve was super smart when it came to stuff like that. But now that he was gone, Peggy resorted to going to her uncle Tony and Bruce for help. She was getting help, but it wasn't the same as it would've been with her own father.

**Yeah nothing could change what you mean to me.**

"Mommy let's me sleep in one of your T-shirts." Peggy informs with a smile. And it's true. A couple months after Steve's death, Peggy was having a horrible time coping without her father. Nightmares were more frequent and intense. They even plagued her in her little naps she took. She could never sleep without seeing Steve being burned alive or him jumping out of one of the twin towers. They were all horrible. It wasn't until Natasha had given Peggy one of Steve's t-shirt to sleep in that the nightmares stop. But still they're stuck in her memory and will never go away. Once in a while she'll get 'em, but not as frequently.

**There's a lot that I could say**

A smile spreads across her face as she chuckles softly, "I think it still smells like you." She whispers, sniffling as a tear rolls down her cheek. And it did. Every night Peggy would fall asleep with a smile on her face when she leaned down and sniffed her father's t-shirt. It did indeed smell like him. Even on Natasha's bad nights, she would crawl into her daughter's bed and hold her close as she buried her nose into the shirt. It calmed them both when they needed it.

**But just hold me now**

"I don't even sleep with the light on even more," Peggy says with a smile remembering when she used to sleep with the light on every night waiting for her father to come home and give her a goodnight kiss. Sometimes it felt as if he really did because she'd wake the next morning and her cheek would be tingling.

**Cause our love will find the way**

The slight happiness that memory brought also brought despair and reminded her of what she's missing in her life. "I try not to cry daddy," She says as tears begin to pour of her eyes unwillingly, yet she doesn't fight it like she did last time. "But i-it hurts." She sobs.

**And baby your all that I want**

"I really miss you daddy." She sobs harder.**  
><strong>

**When you're lying here in my arms. I'm finding it hard to believe**

"Can you see me?"

**We're in heaven**

* * *

><p><em>Peggy sprinted upright, tears pouring down her face as a scream comes out of her mouth. A scream she didn't even realize she was emitting. It sounded far to distance for her to making it. But she was and she only knew that when she turned and found Natasha standing there with fear in her eyes. Peggy bursted into tears and wrapped her arms around her mother.<em>

_Natasha reacted immediately upon seeing her daughter so upset. She pulled Peggy into her body and held her close as her own tears made an appearance. '__**Another nightmare.**__' Natasha thought as Peggy continued to sob. But she wasn't exactly surprised considering what today was._

_That day marked the second year after Steve's death and the twin tower's attack. Peggy has nonstopping nightmares and she would just come too paralyzed, but there are a few days out of the year where she would wake up screaming from them. Steve's birthday, 9-11, Christmas, Natasha's birthday, her parent's wedding anniversary and her own birthday._

_Natasha kissed her daughter's head and brushed the hair out of her face as she shushed her. She didn't offer comforting words because they mean and do nothing. They don't make neither of them feel better, so they're better off not being said. All Natasha can do right now is be there for her daughter. Like she is almost every night._

_With a sigh Natasha picks Peggy up in her arms and carries the distraught child out of her room and into her own room. Natasha lays Peggy on the king sized bed before climbing on beside her. Peggy immediately presses her back into Natasha's chest as Natasha encircles her arms around Peggy's waist. Peggy continues to sob, her shirt getting drenched with tears, but her pants getting drenched with something. Natasha feels and smells it a minute later. "Oh sweetheart."_

_Peggy sobs, "I-I… I-I… *gulps* so-sor-sorry… mu.. mu… mama!" she screams turning around and pressing her face into Natasha's chest._

"_Hey, Hey, Hey…" Natasha says sternly forcing Peggy's head out of chest to look at her. "Love, calm down, everything's okay."_

"_But… B-B… Bu-… But I-I… I-I p-p-p… pee-… I pe-" Peggy tried to say, but nothing coherent would come out._

"_Hey stop it, I'm not mad. It's okay. Let's get you out of these pants. But first I need you stop crying, you're starting to hyperventilate." It takes a while, but after Natasha begins to speak calmly to Peggy she starts to react towards the soothing sound of her mother's voice. Just like any child would. "There," Natasha whispered caressing Peggy's cheek. "Much better." She commented before pulling herself up and out of bed. She threw the blankets back and easily slipped of Peggy's pants and shirt leaving her in her underwear. Sighing Natasha spoke softly, "I'll be back I need to get you some new underwear." She said and slipped out of the before Peggy could object. Natasha returned a few minutes later with new underwear, but no new PJs. "All you PJ's are dirty baby." Peggy doesn't reply, she just watches blankly as Natasha slips off her soaked underwear and on new, dry ones. Natasha surveyed the room clicking her tongue wondering what she could dress her daughter in for the night. It was a mystery to Peggy how Natasha found it, but she did. She watched as her mother crossed the room towards the corner where the laundry hamper is. Peggy assumes she's just going to wear one of Natasha's shirts or something, but when Natasha lifts the basket off the ground and places it aside, it makes Peggy raise an eyebrow. She sits up and watches as her mother rummages through a box that was sitting behind the hamper. She's about to ask what she's looking when for when Natasha pulls it out. A gasp escapes her immediately._

_It was her father's shirt._

_Well one of them. It was his work out shirt, the one he would wear when he went running. The sight of brought tears to her eyes. Natasha smiled sadly at her daughter and walked up to her. She sat down beside her and looked her in the eye, "This is yours now." She whispered slipping it on over Peggy's head. As she helped Peggy get her arms through she spoke quietly. "That way, when you fall asleep, you'll have your daddy with you. And he'll protect you from the nightmares, okay?"_

_Peggy nods numbly, unable to do anything, but stare down at the shirt that now buries her tiny body in. Subconciously, she leans down and sniffs it. The smell of her father engulfs her and she begins to weep again. "It smells like him." She squeak out crawling into Natasha's lap._

_Natasha smiles down at Peggy, "I know baby. I know."_

* * *

><p>"I want to softball daddy… for you." Peggy whispers leaning forward as she placed the roses down.<p>

**I've been waitin' for so long**

"Mommy told me it was your favorite sport."

**For somethin' to arrive**

"So now I watch every Dodger game with everyone." Peggy says with a smile as she thought back to last Saturday when she was watching the Dodgers vs Angles. Everyone was rooting for the Dodgers which made her smile because she knew if her father was there with them, so would he. Thor seemed to emit the same amount of happiness Steve used to do when he watched games. It made Peggy both sad and happy.

**For love to come along**

"Did you know Uncle Tony is taking us to the game in Los Angeles?!" She says excitedly as she wipes the snot making it's down her face. She reaches insides her jacket pocket and pulls out a handkerchief to blow her nose.

**Now our dreams are comin' true**

"I never stop missing you daddy." Peggy says after a couple of minutes of silence. "Neither does mama."

**Through the good times and the bad**

"Mama told me she doesn't want to marry again." Peggy says glancing back at Natasha who was gazing off into space, a glazed look in her eyes. "But I don't want that for her."

**Yeah - I'll be standin' there by you**

"I want her to be happy again, like you made her happy. And me." Peggy whispers softly to him to keep from her mother over hearing. "Do you?"

**And baby, you're all that I want**  
><strong>When you're lyin' here in my arms<strong>  
><strong>I'm findin' it hard to believe<strong>  
><strong>We're in heaven<strong>

"If mama does marry again, I wont call him daddy. Because I only have one and he's the greatest daddy in the world." Peggy admits with a shrug.

**And love is all that I need**  
><strong>And I found it there in your heart<strong>  
><strong>It isn't too hard to see<strong>  
><strong>We're in heaven, heaven, oooh<strong>

"I love you daddy… I cant wait to see you again." Peggy whispers pressing a kiss to her hand before placing it on his tombstone as she stood.

**You're all that I want**  
><strong>You're all that I need<strong>

"I miss you. Say hi to Grandma Sarah, Grandpa Joseph, Aunt Peggy and uncle Bucky for me."

**We're in heaven**  
><strong>We're in heaven<strong>  
><strong>We're in heaven<strong>


	4. 15 Years Old

**_Unable are the loved to die. For love is immortality. – Emily Dickinson_**

The rain was pouring heavily over the barren ground, soaking the grass and all who walks on it. Today was a bad weather day as the clouds roll together to create a never ending black abyss in the sky. Normal people wouldnt want to be out of their warm, cozy houses just to stand in the bone- chilling air as water pelts them from all around.

See that's the thing, the two figures standing in the middle of a vacant cemetery aren't exactly what you'd call normal. The houses surrounding the cemetery would call them crazy, but right now the cold didn't seem to be bothering them. They clutched to each other for the comfort and warmth their bodies' lack as they stand underneath two thick and sturdy umbrella.

It took them a while to get them and they weren't leaving any time soon. The reason it took them forever: everyone around them kept trying to convince them not to go. But they were stubborn and had left after being lectured. They bundled up under thick layers of coats and mittens, but right now the clothes were suffocating them. They couldn't breathe, they were too busy crying into each other's shoulder. They had made an attempt to speak to the tombstone standing in front of them, but unfortunately they're emotions got the best of them and they erupted in tears before they could get a word out.

They were used to being sad, use to feeling pain, but that day brought on more pain than any other year. They didn't know why, but they did know that they couldn't have stayed home if they tried. Both wanted to see him, visit him and talk to him… even if he couldn't respond back. One of the two figures felt it was her responsibility to speak to her father, inform him on all he's missed. But if only she could get the damn words out!

And the names of these two figures? Peggy and Natasha Rogers.

Peggy pulled away from her mother have many long minutes of crying. She didn't know how long they had been standing there, but the cold was starting to bother her. She didn't want to leave yet, but when Natasha started to realize how cold it was getting for them, she'd want them to leave. But before leaving, Peggy needed to speak with him. She couldn't just come here without saying something and without giving him her rose. Her eleven red roses signifying love, beauty, courage and respect. Also telling the person she's giving it to, "I love you". And there was no one Peggy loved more in the world then her father and mother.

Peggy turned away from Natasha and looked at Steve's tombstone. Her bottom lip wobbled as she read what was engraved on his stone; _Steve Grant Rogers. Beloved Husband, Father, Brother, Teammate and Friend. July 4__th__, 1918 – September 11__th__, 2001._

Peggy didn't even noticed when her mother begin to slowly move away from her, to give her privacy as she always does. Peggy wiped a lone tear cascading down her cheek and took a deep breath.

"It's been 10 years daddy."

**"****And baby, you're all that I want,**

"I started high school." The strain in her voice is evident as she wills herself not to burst out again. She needed to speak to him and she couldn't if she was crying too hard.

**When you're lyin' here in my arms.**

"I made the honor roll," she sobbed. "I hope you're proud of me."

**Finding it hard to believe… we're in heaven.**

"I'm also on the soccer team," Peggy kneeled down in front of her father.

**And love it all that I need,**

"Can't you see me out on the field?"

**And I found it there in your heart, **

Peggy runs a hand through her slightly dampened hair, "I started thinking about colleges." She admits with a half-smile. "Uncle Tony, Bruce, Thor and Clint and auntie Jane, Darcy, Bobbi, Betty and Pepper want me to get into the best one possible."

**It isn't to hard to see, we're in heaven,**

"They believe I can be a great doctor… do you?"

**I've been waiting for so long,**

"I hope you're proud of them." Peggy whispers, "Because I am. They take great care of mom and I and they are my main source of comfort when I miss you terribly." When Peggy was a small child, she vaguely remembers waking up, crawling out of bed before scampering down to one of their bedrooms at night. On these nights, Natasha would be out on a mission and Peggy would have to find comfort in the arms of one of her uncle and aunt's beds. She's the most frequent visitor of Tony and Pepper or Clint and Bobbi. Darcy is a second close followed by Bruce and Betty and Thor and Jane.

**For something to arrive,**

"They talk about you all the time when I'm sad," Peggy says making herself comfortable on the wet grass, not caring if it wets her clothes.

**For love to come along,**

"They tell me all kinds of stories about you. When you guys would go out on a mission or when you're at the tower and you're all having a good time." The memories of her uncles telling her all the wonderful things she didn't know about her daddy brings a smile to her face. She only knew Steve for five years and she thought she knew everything about him, but… apparently there was a lot to learn. Luckily she's fortunately to have her mommy, uncles and aunts to tell her.

**Now our dreams are coming true,**

"They don't want me to forget you… and I wont daddy. I'll never forget you. You'll always be with me." Peggy's hand subconsciously rises to rest upon her chest, over her heart.

**Through the good times and the bad,**

"I know you'll be with me when I walk down the aisle." She sobs leaning forward and placing the roses down before placing her head in her, now, free hands. Her body convulses with sobs as her mind wanders to the future. A future without her father. Steve wont see her graduate high school and medical school, he won't be there to tell her future husband that he'll hurt him if he hurts her. He won't see her walk down the aisle, he won't be there to give her hand. He won't see his grandchildren be born, they won't know who they're grandpa Steve is. But worst of all, she won't ever know who her true father was. All she has of him is stories from her family and she has to live through them in order to understand and know her father. But she doesn't know him personally like all the other little girls have a connection with their father. So if her future husband asks her, 'Tell me about your father', she won't know what to tell him. The thought makes her sob harder.

**I'll be standing there by you!**

"I try not to be sad!" she screams into her hands as she falls forward on the grass, loosing hold on her umbrella. It clashes unceremoniously on the ground besides her making her vulnerable to all viewing eyes and the rain that continues to pelt onto her body. This one movement catches the attention of her mother and Natasha begins to rush towards her daughter. But Peggy is oblivious to all.

**And baby, you're all that I want, when you're lying here in my arms. I'm finding it hard to believe, we're in heaven.**

When Peggy feels arms wrap around her she doesn't try to pull away. She knows her mother's touch anywhere and brings her closer, burying her face into Natasha's chest. "But it's hurts." She finishes pathetically.

**Love is all that I need, and I finding there in your heart,**

... Flash to 5 years old…

_"I try daddy, but it's hurts._

_Is it true you're not coming home?_

_Maybe some day… I can visit you in heaven, okay?_

_I love you so much…"_

_... Flash to 10 years old …_

**_"_****_I love you daddy, I cant wait to see you again._**

**_Say hi to Grandma Sarah, Grandpa Joseph, Aunt Peggy and Uncle Bucky for me."_**

… Present …

"I hope you know you're my hero," she whispers turning her head sideways to face his tombstone. Natasha's fingers continue to run through her daughter's damp hair as she shushes her softly whispering sweet nothings into her ear. Peggy leans into her mother's touch and begins to get drowsy due to her mother's calming voice.

**It isn't too hard to see, we're in heaven,**

"I love you so much." She tightens her hold on Natasha.

**Ohhhh!**

"Can you see me?" her voice echoes throughout the empty cemetery.

**Oh…**

.. 5 ..

_I miss you daddy._

**.. 10 ..**

**_I really miss you dad._**

.. 15 ..

I miss you daddy.

**We're in heaven…"**


End file.
